Friends, Fat, and the 65

I have been greatly blessed by a merciful and loving God. He has given me an abundant life that is chock-full of opportunity, wonderful friends, an adoring husband, and a family I would never want to be without. Yet...in the midst of all these blessings, I still manage to focus on the one part of me that I feel isn't quite right; my body.

Some of my aforementioned wonderful friends and I happen to be walking similar paths in this regard. Sadly, I know that they can relate to my feelings. Several of us are trying to lose weight and get healthy together. As we meet and talk about losing weight, it is not uncommon for one or more of the many failed efforts in our past to take center stage. Inevitably, melancholy begins to descend over us and the self-defeatist talk ensues. I know that this may not seem like a positive...but it actually is. As soon as we begin to feel defeated, one of us reigns in the negativity and helps re-focus our efforts. We begin to remember and discuss why we want to be healthy and, of course, weigh less.

That brings me to my first task. I want to lose a total of 65 pounds. For this reason, I am going to try and brainstorm 65 reasons that I want to lose weight and get healthy. I am going to use this list as a reference throughout my weight-loss journey. Hopefully, looking back at it will help me keep my head in the game!

(Disclaimer: Some of these reasons may be a little ridiculous...feel free to have a laugh at my expense).

I want to lose weight and get fit because:

1. I want to get pregnant!
2. I want to have a healthy pregnancy.
3. I want to have a healthy baby.
4. I don't want diabetes.
5. I don't want high blood pressure.
6. I no longer want my double chin to rest on my chest while I type.
7. I want to wear sleeveless shirts and not worry about the circumference of my upper arm.
8. I want to wear a bathingsuit and not worry about the fact that the backs of my legs look like cottage cheese.
9. I want to go to a store and buy a size that doesn't humiliate me in the checkout line.
10. I want to look at a skinny person without immediately thinking...you must have such confidence and feel free to enjoy life...and be jealous that I don't have that.
11. I want to ride on a zip-line in a rainforest somewhere and not be concerned with looking absurd.
12. I want to look pretty in a picture again.
13. I want to be complimented.
14. I want to wear a sundress without a shrug.
15. I want to wear real work-out clothes...as opposed to a baggy t-shirt and shorts.
16. I want to run in a 5K.
17. I want to get my formerly big butt in a kayak and ride some rapids.
18. I don't want to have high cholesterol.
19. I want to wear a swimsuit without a skirt and feel good about it.
20. I want to run a half-marathon.
21. I want to eat right and not feel deprived...therefore leading to picking up the old, bad eating habits again.
22. I want to catch a surprise glimpse of myself in the mirror and be pleased...not horrified.
23. I want to look back at old pictures of myself with pride, not regret.
24. I don't want heart disease.
25. I want to vacation in Europe, walk around without getting tired, and be in as many cute pictures as I please.
26. I want to live for a really long time so I can, God willing, spend as much time as possible enjoying my husband.
27. I want to believe my husband when he tells me I'm beautiful.
28. I want to not look at skinny people and instantly think...you're skinnier than me.
29. I want to own a beach condo one day...and not be all fat and self-concious when I invite friends and family to come visit.
30. I want to ride in my husband's boat without wearing a tent for a cover-up.
31. I want to post pictures of myself on Facebook without worrying what other people think.
32. I don't want to be that really pretty skinny girl from high school that is now a big, fat 30 year old.
33. I don't want to be disappointed in myself anymore.
34. I want to learn about self-control.
35. I want to learn how to be patient with the weight-loss process.
36. I want to be able to think about something else while getting dressed.
37. I want to look back a year from now and think "Wow! You actually did it!!" instead of "Damnit."
38. I don't want food to rule my life anymore.
39. I don't want to sweat like a pig just because I step outside in the summer.
40. I don't want to exhaust myself by thinking up excuse after excuse for not wanting to exercise. It'd probably be a lot less work to just go do it.
41. I want muscular, yet feminine, shoulders, arms, abs, and legs.
42. I want to be strong.
43. I want to actually enjoy exercise and eating right.
44. I want to be that girl who gets excited about eating clean, whole foods.
45. I don't want to harm my body. Afterall, it's a gift from God.
46. I want to gain a different perspective on my body, my health, and my life.
47. I want to come out on the other side so I can help others walk this difficult journey.
48. I don't want to get cancer.
49. I want to wear heels without my feet screaming in violent protest.
50. I want to actually find a pair of those comfortable jeans people keep talking about.
51. I want my hands to be a little bony and veiny...not chubby.
52. I don't want cankles. Never did.
53. I don't want to beg my friends not to post pictures of me on Facebook and hear them say "You look great!" and not believe them.
54. I don't want to continue to talk about this.
55. I want to focus on more important things...and there are so many more important things.
56. I want to feel a sense of accomplishment and pride.
57. I want a sassy, short hair cut that won't accentuate my triple chin.
58. I want to feel muscles in my body...actually working.
59. I want to put my feet in slender shoes and have them be comfortable.
60. I want this to be a distant memory.
61. I don't want chubby cheeks. I'm not a toddler.
62. I want attractive knees.
63. I want to feel good about myself!
64. I don't want to die from a preventable illness.
65. I want to live a happy and healthy life!

There you have it: sixty-five reasons that I want to lose weight and get fit. I'm going to do it! Stay tuned to see how.